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Gender Studies

This forum is for topics concerning gender roles and gender politics.

What Does It Take to Be a "Good Woman"?

The March 2, 2026 broadcast of Forum focused on Good Woman: A Reckoning, a collection of essays by attorney Savala Nolan who is the executive director of Thelton E. Henderson Center for Social Justice at UC Berkeley. During her interview by Forum host Alexis Madrigal, Nolan discusses what it takes to be a "good woman."

"I think in this culture—maybe it’s not true in every culture—but in this culture women are expected to be good. And the theory that we’re sold is that if we’re good enough, we’ll have a happy life. And goodness means particular things. Being a good woman is different from being a good man. Being a good woman means being malleable, agreeable, helpful, male-centered, quiet, in control of the size and shape of your body, and content not to have much political control. -- Savala Nolan

Among the topics in Nolan's book is an essay that asks, "Why don't more women pay for sex?"

Yes, I know. Women do pay for sex, just not in a way that requires a checkbook, credit card, or ATM withdrawal . . . and not in the same way that men pay for sex (which is not always and strictly monetarily). Everybody pays for sex one way or another. Fortunately, Mommy's and Daddy's "bills" can be written off as tax deductions.

Suggested listening that is stimulus for the ears. Suggested reading that is food for thought and nourishment for the mind.

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Featured Replies

Sounds very interesting, and I agree with all the points you mentioned and quoted. Women are conditioned and socialized to accept having less power and control in the group and societal scheme of things, and both men and women pay for sex, in a somewhat complicated, transactional way, where each one is providing things for the other person. It may be thru money, acts of physical tasks, mental work, emotional work, etc., such as fixing things, preparing food, cleaning, etc..

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